As a woman, we are often described as the passive, the giver or the pleaser in sex. In this subtle influence, on the one hand, men will feel the pressure to please each other and "make each other climax", on the other hand, girls also lose the motivation and drive to fight for their own "sexual happiness". So let's talk today, about sex, what can women do?
Proactive expression of love
Women often see themselves as a very passive player in sex, and I think this idea in itself disempowers women in part.
In the process, we can try to "hold each other down" and let ourselves control the depth, angle and rhythm.
When your body rhythm not only gives yourself pleasure, but also gets feedback from him, you will find a completely different kind of satisfaction than sex in a traditional role.
You will also find that "role swapping" makes both people tend to behave differently, for example, the usually silent boyfriend will make a sound to match your voice; the usually quiet girlfriend becomes full of desire to possess and conquer. This can also help us to deepen our understanding of each other's gender roles and identity.
Sex is a game of the body
Underneath the article on sexless marriages, there are many users commenting that they just want to lie flat when they get home every day, so tired that they don't have any desire at all.
Come to think of it, whether it's talking, doing or making love, it's a way for us to express ourselves, and behind that, it requires life with enough vitality.
To improve the quality of sexual happiness, you can do the following things
- Keep your body in a healthy, energetic state through proper exercise
- Do things that please your body, such as baths and massages
- Conserve the body's energy - for example, stop the endless mental internal exertion, ensure sufficient sleep
- When we keep our bodies healthy and energetic, then we will naturally be "sexually active" and energetic.
Changing perceptions of sex
Many people see sex as a scourge and are reluctant to talk about and learn about things related to sex, which often creates a very awkward situation:
We can't deny the body's spontaneous desires while maintaining an adversarial relationship with them. （The best way to break down sex-related prejudices is to practice them. Don't waste any opportunity to practice, because each one tries to reveal to you what sex really is, what it can bring and how you feel about it.
Everyone has their own answer, and to find out what yours is, be bold and explore it.
Of course, in the process of practice, we need some guidelines so that we can avoid unnecessary harm. For example, having some physical knowledge, drawing the boundaries of what you can accept (meaning willing to bear the consequences), etc.
Take the initiative to provoke his interest
Because of the differences in the physiological structure of men and women, there are natural differences in their approach to the matter of sex.
For example, sex for women is often associated with pregnancy, childbirth and raising offspring, so they will behave more discreetly in short-term relationships.
And because guys tend to reproduce more offspring, they tend to show more desire when they see a new object.
For men and women entering a long-term relationship, this need for sex seems to be reversed. For example, the husband seems to be less active in the sexual matter, while the wife seems to be more enthusiastic than before.
This is because a long-term stable relationship for men will inevitably experience the "novelty" fade, while for women, but means that the two have built up enough trust and dependence between them.
So for a woman, especially a woman in a long-term intimate relationship, take the initiative to provoke each other's desire for you, including giving him enough freshness to see you in a different light and maintain your personal independence to pique his curiosity and desire to conquer you.
Breaking the boundaries of gender
Due to traditional gender roles in society, we often tend to show the gender traits that are more accepted by the dominant culture when we first enter a relationship, but this stereotype is far from the real us. To build a deep relationship you need to break the outer shell and get to the real part inside.
Taking off one's clothes and letting the other person see one's naked body is a shell-breaking process in itself; others include letting the other person into one's body, giving one's full attention during lovemaking, etc. In our respective eyes, the other person is no longer just a gender symbol, but a multiplicity, complex and rich mixture.
When the barriers built up between the two sides are slowly broken down and melted away in the intimate connection, our true face is slowly revealed, which may not be refined and charming enough, but is sincere, beautiful and touching -
Daring sexual fantasies
When we are having sex, the act of sex becomes a pathway to our perception of self. Since it is a pathway, it is up to you to decide exactly where it is going to lead.
You may want to share your sexual fantasies with your partner and have a role play by using props. You may also want to make it a secret that only you know, to have an "intracranial orgasm" that exists only in your mind.
Trust your body's experience, when your fantasies are just right to allow you to experience the most extreme pleasure, then it proves that you are looking in the right direction, and slowly, sex will become a path that will guide you to your true self.