Sexual pleasure is a fundamental aspect of human intimacy, yet for some, it can be marred by discomfort or pain. While it's essential to remember that painful sex is not normal, it's equally vital to recognize that there are ways to mitigate this discomfort. One approach is to explore sex positions that are more comfortable for individuals who experience pain during intercourse.
Before embarking on this journey, it's crucial to consult a healthcare professional, such as a doctor or sex therapist, who can provide guidance and rule out any underlying medical conditions contributing to the pain. Additionally, paying attention to where the pain is localized and its potential associations, such as the menstrual cycle, can be valuable insights.
Here, we will discuss some of the best sex positions that can help alleviate pain during intercourse. However, it's essential to treat this exploration as an experiment and take note of what works and what doesn't. Open communication, ample lubrication, and the inclusion of sex toys for internal or external stimulation can further enhance the experience.
1. 69-ing: Mutual Pleasure without Penetration
Sexual pleasure doesn't always revolve around penetrative intercourse. The classic 69 position offers an alternative way to enjoy mutual satisfaction. In this arrangement, both partners simultaneously pleasure each other orally, eliminating the need for potentially painful penetration. It provides an opportunity to focus on giving and receiving pleasure without the stress of penetration.
2. Spooning: Shallow Penetration and Clitoral Stimulation
Spooning isn't just reserved for post-coital cuddling; it can also serve as an excellent sexual position for those who find deep penetration painful. With the "little spoon" (you) lying on your side, your partner positions themselves behind you, penetrating gently. Your buttocks can provide cushioning, allowing for shallower penetration. From this position, you can stimulate your clitoris with your hands or a toy, enhancing pleasure. Experiment with the depth and pace that feels most comfortable for you.
3. Scissoring: A Different Take on Missionary

Reimagine the missionary position with scissoring. In this arrangement, your partner's legs straddle your body, bringing your genitals into contact. From this position, you can engage in pleasurable touching with your hands or by moving your bodies, with the option of penetration or non-penetration. For added comfort, consider lying flat on top of each other, a position that relaxes your body, reducing tension and discomfort.
4. Reverse Cowgirl: Control and Comfort
For individuals experiencing painful penetration, having control over the depth and pace can be transformative. Avoiding positions like doggie style, which can exacerbate discomfort, try the reverse cowgirl. This position allows you to straddle your partner, facing their feet. From here, you can control the speed and depth of penetration, opting for a gentler, shallower approach. It's all about finding what feels right for you.
5. Face-to-Face: Connection and Gentleness
Sitting facing each other, legs intertwined, the face-to-face position offers a shallower form of penetration, making it ideal for those experiencing pain during sex. Any thrusting in this position is gentler and has less momentum. Moreover, it fosters an intimate connection with your partner, enabling you to respond to each other's body language and facial expressions.
Prioritizing Pleasure and Comfort
Above all, it's crucial to listen to your body and maintain open communication with your partner. Everyone deserves enjoyable, pain-free sexual experiences. By openly discussing what does and doesn't feel good, you and your partner can explore different positions, experiment with new sensations, and develop a sexual routine that brings pleasure and comfort to both of you.
In the pursuit of pleasurable and comfortable sex, remember that seeking professional guidance is essential, and consulting with healthcare providers or sex therapists can help identify and address any underlying issues. With patience, communication, and a willingness to explore, you can unlock a world of sexual pleasure tailored to your unique needs and preferences.